Six weeks in and (much like a Rastafarian’s hair after another lost opportunity for a good shampooing) scores are starting to compress together. Pulling off the win is more about WHO you play than ever before.
Giallorossi 165 v Shawshank Redemption 160
Case in point, the bottom two scores went head-to-head in a classic thriller. With a mere five points in it, my spidey sense is tingling with anticipation of a potential ‘point adjustment’ debacle on Wednesday. For now, however, it seems that the Italian Gold Medallions (a 9-carat gold glaze over a tin lid) can bask in their awesomeness… thanks almost entirely to the MNF football performance of the Denver D (4 sacks, 4 INT, 2 TD). The Shanks, on the other hand, chose almost the perfect team to lose, even with unexpected standout Andy “fine and dandy” Dalton (386 yards, 3 TDs, 3 INT, FUM). Several benched players were loitering around with enough points for a Shankin’ good win, but it was not to be…
Da Gnomes 226 v Sultans of Suck 193
The Sultans were looking for that elusive back-to-back win to REALLY cement the effectiveness of their new branding (logo still in development, subject to copyright and an appopriate MPAA rating) and they outscored themselves from last week. Unfortunately, the red breeched Gnomes and their large, pointy hats decided this was their week to return to dancing on tabletops… and they gleefully crushed the knuckles of the Sultans with their highland gig. The top dancing scorer was Robert Griffin Encounters of The Third Kind (320 yards, 3 TDs, INT) while, seated with his backrest in an upright position, the dubious honor of ‘least bruised knuckles’ belonged to Ray “Sugar and Spice” Rice (106 yards, 2 TDs).
Killer Koalas 230 v won and Done 175
This week’s most anticipated (and furry) matchup – koala versus rabbit – turned out to be more than a let-down, it was wholesale destruction. The koalas took the high ground early, possibly as much as 3 or 4 naps earlier in the day, and the rabbits happily hippity-hopped right into the middle of a giant Target logo. Despite the possible trademark infringement, the Koalas, their Kelvinator 1000’s, and Aaron ‘The Artful Dodger’ Rodgers (355 yards, 6 TDs) did the rest. The Won’n’Done’s had some pretty decent-sized bucks in their midst, the largest of which was A.J. Green-Backs (135 yards, 2 TDs), but they all ended up flat in the end.
Round 7 beckons. Who feels lucky?